Friday morning
Oh God
I drink to much...yes yes I have known for a while....but this morning as I pondered my head as I was moving from my slumber .....I just new I had to own it..A bit of an epiphany I guess...Its just time to change..I don't want to wake up with hangovers and heart aches...Franlky I probably only go one day a week without sucking piss...I have already purged into my morning pages and I don't want to become numb to it..like its an idea and I can be creative with it..Its not its an illness..a liver killing soul destroying illness and even though I feel I have kept a lid on it for a bit...I just know I am close to going beyond the reef ..I pride myself on being a fantastic swimmer but even thorpie tires after a while and shit he's not quaffing down wine or copious amounts of cigarettes before a big swim-meet.Lover heard me when I spoke about my up and coming looming alcoholism (yes I said it) and without judgement he agreed.He's a keeper..A non drinking keeper I might add.
So its time to ease up...
The weekend stretches ahead...I want some more sun.
I fancy taking ots of photos this weekend...mad crazy about my camera...and seems everywhere I look is a picture..
Snot levels are dropping..cough is still shitting me.
the drugs make me feel like poo.
I am ready for lots of excitement this week as I finally move the rest of my things into my new world
Moving can officially suck..but I am facing it with the gusto because I know I am going to love having all my stuff around me.
Massage table arrives this weekend and I am going to set up my room and massage my lover till he melts like chocolate under my fingers.
I am listening to Leonard Cohen and dreamin dreamy thoughts...I love that man.
Beautiful lover is sitting on the sofa watching a slide show.And the sweet smell of pot wafts around me...seems to be a very Leonard kind of moment.
Through HQ's window I see palms and gums and blue blue sky.....the light is fantastic...
and I am honoured to have the eyes to see.
This has been a beautiful week (perfect for recognising when one has a bit of a fucking drinking problem) Lots of merging with lover..getting our stuff worked out...moving with more joy in and around each other...learning to live together. the balancing act is becoming organic and there by the grace of god go thee.
.....LIFE
I drink to much...yes yes I have known for a while....but this morning as I pondered my head as I was moving from my slumber .....I just new I had to own it..A bit of an epiphany I guess...Its just time to change..I don't want to wake up with hangovers and heart aches...Franlky I probably only go one day a week without sucking piss...I have already purged into my morning pages and I don't want to become numb to it..like its an idea and I can be creative with it..Its not its an illness..a liver killing soul destroying illness and even though I feel I have kept a lid on it for a bit...I just know I am close to going beyond the reef ..I pride myself on being a fantastic swimmer but even thorpie tires after a while and shit he's not quaffing down wine or copious amounts of cigarettes before a big swim-meet.Lover heard me when I spoke about my up and coming looming alcoholism (yes I said it) and without judgement he agreed.He's a keeper..A non drinking keeper I might add.
So its time to ease up...
The weekend stretches ahead...I want some more sun.
I fancy taking ots of photos this weekend...mad crazy about my camera...and seems everywhere I look is a picture..
Snot levels are dropping..cough is still shitting me.
the drugs make me feel like poo.
I am ready for lots of excitement this week as I finally move the rest of my things into my new world
Moving can officially suck..but I am facing it with the gusto because I know I am going to love having all my stuff around me.
Massage table arrives this weekend and I am going to set up my room and massage my lover till he melts like chocolate under my fingers.
I am listening to Leonard Cohen and dreamin dreamy thoughts...I love that man.
Beautiful lover is sitting on the sofa watching a slide show.And the sweet smell of pot wafts around me...seems to be a very Leonard kind of moment.
Through HQ's window I see palms and gums and blue blue sky.....the light is fantastic...
and I am honoured to have the eyes to see.
This has been a beautiful week (perfect for recognising when one has a bit of a fucking drinking problem) Lots of merging with lover..getting our stuff worked out...moving with more joy in and around each other...learning to live together. the balancing act is becoming organic and there by the grace of god go thee.
.....LIFE
posted by Lovely Girl at 9:40 AM
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